It's been a birthday

It’s been a weird birthday. It hasn’t been a sparkly, special, “I’m so loved” birthday. It’s been an interesting birthday.

Lowlights:

• ·         Waking up at 5:45 AM to a wailing Felix and a whole lot of rain.
• ·         Absolutely terrible food at our lunchtime restaurant. (Dirty plates, separated wing sauce, burnt “dino nuggets”, soggy fries, greasy tortilla shell, missing elements of fish tacos. Basically, everything tasted like we got last night’s leftovers.
• ·         The lecherous old man from Roy’s choir who told me how very nice I was looking as I was walking away from him, and later made comments about how pretty our teenage babysitters are becoming.
• ·         Finding a hole in the lining of my new-to-me birthday moto jacket.
• ·         Finding a used tissue in my new-to-me birthday moto jacket.
• ·         Going for a run after the rain finally stopped, only to have Owen shriek continuously, the entire two miles, on his scooter, after changing his mind four times about whether he should be on a scooter or in a stroller. I swear the kid woke up anyone and everyone in our neighborhood enjoying a Sunday afternoon nap.
• ·         Cutting out 800 (not exaggerating) paper motorcycles for our church’s VBS that starts tomorrow morning. Of course these motorcycles were needed for the first day. I have a blister on my index finger.
• ·         Not having any time to bake myself a birthday dessert. Or birthday meal.

Highlights:

• ·         A wonderful card from my kiddos at breakfast. James, “Happy birthday to you. Now I said it, now I’m done.” Owen, “Happy birthday Mommy! I’m going to give you a present! Thank you!” Felix, “Uh oh.”
• ·         A new-to-me birthday moto leather jacket from Roy.
• ·         A brand new pair of Italian leather driving moccasins from Roy. They are seriously gorgeous.
• ·         Owen sobbing his exhausted little heart out at the conclusion of Mulan. (Put on so I could cut out more motorcycles.) “Why are you crying Owen?” “I don’t even know. I just am!!!!!”
• ·         James calmly inspecting his digital wristwatch as Owen sobbed. “Oh, it is past my toothbrushing time.”
• ·         Felix being the squishiest and snuggliest baby ever and showing off his new word (“uh oh”) to his grandparents. (As in, “Uh oh, I am grabbing the motorcycles Mommy just cut out.”)
• ·         Calls and texts from family and best friends.
• ·         Roy making me stop cutting out motorcycles at 8PM. Now I need a Band-Aid.

Bedtime Stories

The Hideous Bog Monster Who Waits in Your Backyard

By James Smith

There were once two campers who loved to camp. One day they camped out. They didn’t know there was a bog monster. He had eaten all the people who camped, even their tents. The campers kept on camping. They set up their tents in the morning. In the afternoon they ate hot dogs for supper and roasted marshmallows over a fire for dessert. After that they went into their tents. They slept for a long time. They knew about that bog monster and then suddenly something went “SMACK CRUNCH SMACK CRUNCH” and woke them up. And then, they did something crazy. The tent flap zipped open and then, at the final second, the tent poles fell and the campers tied the bog monster up! And then he tried to get out and he flapped and fliggled his tentacles. But, with their strong muscles, they tied him up so tight I bet he couldn’t move. Then they carried him down to the basement and buried him with a lot of stuff. The next day they went to the store and bought a new tent. 

The End.

We Are Going To A Club Meeting Right Now

By Owen Smith

The club meeting will be upstairs in my bed. Then, at the club meeting, everyone has to be quiet. But, some of the guys makes me talk to every animal and Pete talks to Lighting McQueen. He’s the best friend I’ve ever seen. And then, something waked the animals up. They saw a big, bed monster. And it banged on the wall of the bunk bed. I tried to tie them up in a suitcase. THEN, something stopped and had some red on it. It was just Lightning.

The End.